Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
where are my pants?
in the oven.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
