I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
