Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
