he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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