Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize