There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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