dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
