Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize