Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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