He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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