what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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