Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Randomize
