and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
how do flat chested girls get laid?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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