Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
