I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Randomize
