He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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