Who did Billy Mays play for?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
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