So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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