Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
3pm strippers are depressing
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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