then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
