Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
this must be what syphilis tastes like
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize