I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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