My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
