I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Randomize
