What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize