im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
It was confusing and full of hummus
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize