I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
