Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize