We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
NoShamevember. You game?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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