6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
