she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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