We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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