Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
