i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
