i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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