then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
