I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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