Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
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