he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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