with your own penis?
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
