Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
