maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
