i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
