like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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