theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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