I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize
