is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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