small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
this is an emotional support booty call
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
