i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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