omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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