her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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