today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The Olympian is in my bed
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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