***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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